No One Should Know [2]

Pairing: Sakurai Sho/Aiba Masaki
Rating: NC-17
Lenght: one shot (2 parts)


The gasps were echoing against the walls of Aiba’s room. Two men were laid down onto the bed touching their bodies blatantly with their hands and mouths. Sho was on top giving his friend an unreasonable pleasure as Aiba was still tense. He did not stop of thinking that what they were doing was a horrible mistake and he hated himself for being unable to say him no.

Sho began to rub the two bodies and their crotches touched slightly. Masaki was trying to enjoy their last time so he started to bite Sho’s neck as his hands moved up and down on his back to remove his T-shirt. Then, Sho figured the lying he was living out. His mind was stormed out with thoughts of his wedding, his fiancée, his family and work, but it was covered for the alcohol’s effect making him to progress with Masaki.

Sho wanted to see his friend undressed like that time because he remembered how hard he was only watching his naked skin. He leaned on his knees to remove Aiba’s clothes, his T-shirt, his trousers, even his underwear. And it was like before, he felt the heaven in front of his eyes waiting for him; his pale skin was some reddened because of his bites, his cheeks totally flushed while Masaki was biting his lower lip with embarrassment and desire and his eyes was looking at him asking more.

Then, the thin man got up to approach Sho and suck his collarbone wrapping his arms around his waist. That gesture became a hug when Sho embraced him tightly. Masaki hid his head into his friend’s neck and he smelled his scent which was a mix between alcohol, sweat and his natural odor.

“Undress yourself quickly; I want to finish it as soon as possible…” Masaki whispered with a deeper voice. Sho frowned noticing how odd he was that night.

“Why do you want it fast?” Sho asked him while he was playing with his hair.

“Because it is hurting more than I thought” a tear was free to fall but Sho did not notice it. Inside of Masaki, a strong feeling was torturing him in his heart while he was unable to not take advantage of the situation. His mind only repeated over and over that he could not forget it after, but his heart needed Sho’s touches, attention and care. Sho was his until his family forced him to live the life they wanted. For Masaki, he could understand it, the situation was horrible for Sho and he supported his friend a lot in the past. What disturbed Aiba was that Sho obeyed them and started to change, so much that he almost forgot his friends who were always by his side. Since then, Masaki’s heart was full of pain and the only one who could relieve it was Sakurai. Because of that, he was going to have sex with him even if it would mean to ruin his life, all he built to be perfect. Something in Masaki’s mind was telling him that maybe it was better than left Sho to continue his lie.

“Why do you say that?” Sho broke away their contact to look him trying to understand what he felt or thought.

“Just end what you began” his rage was increasing and he did not know how much he could handle. Sho was worried about Masaki, even if his actions would hurt so many people; he hated the idea of hurting him more. According of all those years which they had spent together, Aiba would not tell him more so he decided to do what he asked him.

Sho laid down with Masaki and kissed him hardly while his hand rubbed his nipples almost hard and his stomach. The rhythmic was kept by Sho as he bit and sucked every inch of his skin. Sakurai focused on Aiba’s nipples because he desired to see how hard that action could put Masaki. Sho’s member was aching inside of his trousers but he waited a little more, his lust was obligating him to drive Masaki crazy.

Sakurai’s mouth got down licking his stomach and his belly button as his hand was so close to his friend’s member. Sho could hear the gasps and prayers that Masaki was muttering while his chest was up and down repeatedly and he really thought that he was hearing the most beautiful song.

Wanting to end as well, Sho removed his trousers and underwear under the gaze of Aiba and before Sho placed over him again, Masaki gathered his legs opening them to provoke Sakurai more. A smirk appeared in his face when he saw the move that his friend did and he kneed on the bed to approach Masaki.

“How could I resist to not fuck you before?” Sho muttered with a deep voice which made a shiver in Masaki’s body. Then, Sakurai’s hand caught gently his friend’s member and started to pump it up and down slowly. Aiba wanted more, his mind and body was asking it desperately and Sho just gave him the least possible because he desired to spend the longest time with him.

“I really don’t know, but Sho-chan, please...” even if Sho tried to prolong the end the most he wanted, his body was aching with pleasure which needed to get out.

“Okay, do you have lube?” a horrible idea passed into his mind, he could not be like he wanted to be without lube. Aiba nodded and pointed at the nightstand with his hand. Sho opened the drawer to get a pot and leave it near them. He stopped when Masaki caught his arm before to start.

“Are you sure?” Aiba did not want to hear the answer but those words came out from his mouth so easily.

“Even if I say no, neither of us could stop already” his eyes was burning with desire and fear, but much more with pain. They were like two teenagers breaking the rules and doing something forbidden as they were full of fear, panic and excitement.

Sho picked up the lube and spreaded his fingers. Knowing that Aiba was with other men, he could do it swiftly. He inserted 2 fingers at the same time hearing Masaki’s moans when he moved them and inserted the third. Meanwhile, Sho was spreading his member with more lube because their lusts were in the limit. His fingers left Aiba’s hole and the tip was rubbing it to make his friend prayed him.

“Sho-chan… please…” his words were a moan which echoed against the wall and Sho’s ears. Sakurai leaned on his forearm beside Aiba’s head and the two were so close noticing each other’s breath. Masaki wrapped his arms around his neck to hold on and Sho made an abrupt thrust making Aiba felt complete. As soon as Masaki adjusted to him, Sakurai started to move rhythmically while their moans were louder.

For a few minutes, they were in a different world only for them, without problems, weddings, lies or people who tried to create perfect humans. Sho could sense the true happiness when he tasted the flavour of the forbidden which was hidden inside of Masaki. His friend was his liberation to his new life; he wanted to start a new life beside him, with or without society’s approval. He discovered his true feelings about Masaki.

“Ma-kun… Come with me…” their mouths collided into a hard kiss which showed their necessity for each other. Sho increased his speed and touched Aiba’s member as Masaki nailed his back while the pleasure exploded inside of him coming on Sho’s hand and his stomach. The tense around Sakurai’s member helped him to come a few thrust after inside of Masaki. The two stayed still relaxing their breaths as Sho left a few kisses in his friend’s neck.

“You just ruined your life” Masaki whispered difficulty between gasp and gasp. Sho smiled and denied with his head wanting to explain him all.

“You showed me what is live” their gazes made contact and Sho decided to get out from his body and lie down beside Aiba. For a moment, Sakurai doubted if he could hug his friend and then sleep together, but after all, they just showed how they needed each other, so he grabbed the sheet and covered their bodies while he approached Masaki to hug him. Then the tiredness forced them to sleep without mattering about the next day.




Before the sunrise appeared, a thin man tidied his stuffs into a bag and picked up a luggage which was placed inside a closet. He stopped in front of a bed with a sleepy man over it and almost crying, he left a letter over the nightstand beside a black box.
“Good bye, Sho-chan…” he muttered with a knot in his throat and left the apartment trying to do the least noise possible as his life started to break.




The sunlight burnt his eyes when he tries to open them, his head was aching and his instinct was telling him that he had to get up quickly. His hands rubbed the bed but they did not find anyone. He frowned and stood up finally. He called his friend’s name but nobody answered. He looked around searching for someone but nobody was found less a box with a letter.
Sho opened the letter to read:

Good morning.

I know that when you read this, I won’t be there anymore so I can confess my feelings finally. Since Juniors I’ve loved you no matter what, so being your friend, feeling your care made me to conform and hide my feelings. I never thought that you could love me and even less, you would want to be with me. Tonight was a revelation and made me so happy but it was too late for both.

I don’t think that we will meet again, this morning I’ll take my plane to Australia where a company offered me an indefinite contract so maybe I won’t return to Japan anymore. I believe that it’s better for both, you’ll married, I’ll work to the best company of photography…

Our relationship was impossible. Not because of the society, but because of us. We have so many fears to overcome and no time already to do it.

I hope you don’t hate me and, please forgive me. Thanks for all.

I love you, Sho-chan.

Aiba Masaki.

PS: I hope you like what it’s inside of the box.

After read the letter, Sho was crying like if his heart would have lost the desire to live. His hope to change disappeared as his hands kept the letter shivering full of rage, impotence and pain without knowing what to do. He lost the only person he had loved in his entire life. His mind tried to understand how it could happen thinking that all was a lie, a bad dream, that he was still sleeping by his side and he only have to wake up and say Masaki how much he love him. Sho knew perfectly how the life was showing him the most important person in his life. He was feeling the pain which Masaki felt when he knew that Sho would marry his fiancée.

Sho was thinking in what to do without him, how his life would be since then. He was more afraid than in his entire life and his wedding was waiting for him in a few hours. His guts to overcome obstacles faded away as his desire to die increased swiftly. Sho tried to avoid stupid ideas from his mind while his eyes bumping with the box which was by the letter’s side.

He caught the box powerless and opened it slowly finding a dark green bow tie. His trembling hand rubbed its soft fabric and picked up a piece of paper where a word was written: Omedetou.

The bow tie was hidden on the box again and Sho stayed on the floor crying as his mind tried to choose the right decision.




His suit was making him to sweat because of the midsummer heat. Sho was waiting in front of the church to welcome wedding’s guests. His brother was by his side and the 2 almost complete families were inside of the chapel. Sho had his face darkened but a smile appeared when Satoshi and Kazunari got out of their car and approached him.

“You should know that if we come it’s because Masaki-kun asked us to do it” Kazunari spat with his still-angry voice. Instead of him, Ohno hugged him and blessed his future with his new wife. The couple came into the church and he kept his mind in what Kazunari said. Masaki asked them to come. He bit his lower lip stopping the tears from his eyes.

After 5 minutes, Jun appeared too with his beautiful wife and his two perfect daughters. The oldest ran to Sho to hug him as the rest of the family walked calmly. Sakurai picked up the girl and felt the vitality which all children have.

“Thank you for coming” Sho smiled to Jun and his wife as he made a little bow and the couple answered him in the same way.

“I can’t leave a friend alone in his wedding” Jun said being as cool as always and Sho laughed loving his insight a lot. The boyfriend saw how the family walked into the church and occupied their seats. He was told by his brother that he had to go inside to wait to his girlfriend. Sho just nodded.

He was not nervous or regretful; he was going to do what he had to. That day, he was so cold and sad but no one less his friends could realize it. Only they knew that Sho truly.

The fiancée’s sister grabbed his arms and both walked to the altar where the priest was waiting. Sho greeted him with a bow and he turned around to see how his future wife came in dressed with the most beautiful wedding dress he had seen in his life. He had to admit that she was spectacular but a pang of pity pierced in his heart. In his heart, only Masaki had place.

When his girlfriend arrived, the couple held their hands and he could see how happy she was in that moment. Sho swallowed trying hard to control himself of running outside to search for Masaki as he rubbed a dark green bow tie which was around his neck nervously.

The priest started to talk and Sho only could think in the last night. His last night with Masaki. He remembered all, even drunk; he remembered each detail of his skin and how perfect Masaki was between his arms.

The priest ruined his memories when he started to say the marriage vows. His girlfriend was repeating all the priest said while her eyes were looking inside of his empty eyes. Then the priest asked her.

“Yes, I will” she smiled satisfied and the priest continued with Sho who repeated the vows as well. Then the question came. Sho breathed deeply and feeling the worst person in the world, he answered.

“Yes, I will” the words were spoken almost in a whisper but the priest made them to put the rings. Her moves were quickly and happily but Sho moved if all his body weighed the double.

“You can kiss the wife” the priest finished the ceremony and Sho removed the veil to approach her. He closed his eyes first and then his mind told him “Think in Masaki”. Sho could kiss her and everyone there burst into applauses and blessings.

Sho tried so hard to smile, but he was dead inside.




After the banquet, his 3 friends could catch him alone. They were the only who realized Sho’s mental status. Sakurai did not want to talk but Ninomiya’s anger exploded.

“It’s your fault that Masaki had gone! At least you should tell us what the fuck happened between him and you, shouldn’t you?” Ohno stopped him from punching his face hardly as Jun placed himself in front of Sho.

“He told me that he was in love with me…” Sho blocked a sob in his throat but Ninomiya could not calm himself.
“Then why didn’t stop him and married that woman?! Are you and asshole?!” he shouted his friend mercilessly and Satoshi scolded him into mutters.

“Because he told me by letter when he had gone! Do you believe that if he were here, I would marry her?! But without him, I need a path to follow because I only want to die!” he shouted full of pain and sadness trying to erase the sorrow from his soul being unsuccessful. Kazunari stared at him seeing how Sho let himself fall to the floor rubbing his back against the wall and covering his face to not show all the tears which were falling.
Satoshi and Jun never saw him like that and it was so painful to live. They tried to stand him up but Sho refused it. Then, Ninomiya approached and rubbed his bow tie.

“He gave it to you like a present, didn’t he?” Sho nodded and Kazunari only smiled. “C’mon, stand up, we’ll help you” he caught him by one side and Jun caught the other. The 3 went to the toilet to fix him a bit.

He told them all, what happened between them since the beginning to the last night. By some way, he felt more relieved after but his friends were totally amazed. They asked him if he wanted to go to search Aiba but he denied.

“For once in my life I have to respect what he decided by himself” he answered surely. The rest understood what he meant and then, joined the party again.




Her skin did not taste like Masaki’s, her attitude was not like Masaki’s, she was not Masaki. But thinking in him, he could pass their first night together.

Sho was looking at the dark sky. His eyes were lost on the horizon. He was asked by himself if he did the right thing, what would have happened if he had gone to search Masaki, how much his life would have changed.

“This is the life I have to live since today…” he muttered giving up to his destiny.

He wanted to take other shower because he felt dirty after having been with her. He felt rather than cheating on her, was cheating on Masaki. His mind needed to sleep but he did not want to be in the same bed that she so he closed his eyes there, on the armchair which was by a window’s side.

“I hope you could forgive me some day…” he said as his hand held a dark green bow tie.




I really cried writing it and rereading it to fix the mistakes. This is the end to this one shot. If you like an epiloge (I don't say it will end happy) say it to me on the comments <3
I am not made to angst... xD
I hope you "like" it and thanks for reading! ^~^